Burnout, Overwhelm, Self-Care, Self-Love
I can do it myself.
How many times do you tell yourself this — even when it feels like you’re drowning in overwhelm and endless responsibilities?
Sometimes you push yourself to your limits because you feel like you’re advocating for your power and independence. But here’s what happens:
You try to quietly power through your exhaustion. You stay and work late, overextending yourself. Tasks pile up, your priorities fall through the cracks and then you’re left picking up the pieces…
See, advocating for yourself isn’t about showing yourself that you can do it all.
Advocating for yourself is about realizing when you need support and asking for what you need. It’s about feeling comfortable with telling yourself, “I can’t do this alone. I need more support” and then asking for what you need from those around you.
But communicating your needs to others can feel like the hardest thing to do.
Why is this?
Perhaps, you avoid asking because you fear judgment. Or you’re a people-pleaser and don’t want to “rock the boat”. Or maybe it’s because you don’t want to feel exposed and vulnerable.
Getting Comfortable With Vulnerability
Asking for what you need leaves you open to rejection and criticism.
The other person might say no.
They may even judge you, just as you feared.
But some will say yes.
And those who do are the people with whom you build powerful support systems. You give and take and share with each other, creating beautiful life-long relationships in the process.
When you self-advocate and ask for support, you are practicing self-love.
Because you care about yourself enough to get help when you need it, instead of letting yourself shoulder the weight of the world alone. And you will learn that other people actually want to contribute to you.
But what would happen if you tried to do everything alone?
What Would Happen if You Didn’t Speak Up?
The consequences go beyond your needs being unmet.
Let’s say you’re unhappy with how you and your partner communicate. When you share a frustrating experience, your partner immediately goes into problem-solving mode. Yet, all you want is someone to listen and empathize.
Yet, you don’t speak up about how you feel.
Over time, you feel resentment. There’s a disconnect between what you desire (empathy) and what you’re receiving (solutions). And you feel frustrated because you’re not honoring your needs and being authentic with your emotions.
See, we often stay silent because it feels easier… in the moment.
Yet, if you ignore your needs and let your problems fester long-term, they can lead you to feel isolated, alone and unsupported.
4 Tips to Help You Ask for What You Need
Instead of struggling alone with the weight of the world on your shoulders, ask for support. You may be surprised to learn that other people want to help you succeed and thrive.
Following these four tips will help you break the silence, ask for what you need, and finally respect your well-being.
#1 Stop Asking If You “Deserve” What You Want
One reason why you might refuse to ask for help is because you feel undeserving.
You don’t think you’re worthy of help or affection.
I’m here to tell you that you have incredible self-worth and that you deserve to claim a life where you feel heard, respected, and loved.
If you need more support from your partner when you’re feeling overwhelmed, ask for it. Don’t feel like you need to “deserve” it before you can make such a request.
If you’re overextended at work and need a personal day, ask for it. Preserving your health shouldn’t be something you have to question.
You deserve it.
#2 Create and Respect Your Boundaries
In Psychology Today, F. Diane Barth L.C.S.W. said, “Boundaries represent your values and beliefs.” Thus, the first step to creating healthy boundaries is to identify your values and priorities.
Your values and priorities lead you to manifest the life you desire. They also set natural boundaries — things and activities that are aligned with your values and priorities.
Let’s say you want to make quality time with friends and family a priority. If you’re burning the midnight oil at work, then your actions are incongruent with this priority.
See, boundaries aren’t just for other people to respect. They’re also something for YOU to respect.
Asking for what you need isn’t something you only ask of others. It’s also something your values and priorities ask of YOU.
#3 Be Assertive When Communicating Your Needs
When asking for what you need, you might feel embarrassed.
Instead of clearly stating what you need, you may hide your request in filler “pleasantries”:
- When you have time, could you…
- … but only if it’s not too much of a bother.
- I know you might be busy, but…
You might find yourself doing this at work when asking something of a co-worker or communicating with a superior.
Yet, what you’re communicating is that your needs are secondary and can be attended to “when they have time” or if “it’s not too much of a bother.”
However, your needs are essential, just like anything else.
If something is not working for you, communicate it clearly: I’m feeling this way. And I need this to help me feel better or resolve this challenge.
#4 Learn When to Ask for Help
If you struggle with being able to fulfill your priorities and honor your needs, you may need to rely on your support systems.
Instead of shouldering everything yourself, you can ask for help.
If you feel yourself burning out, you can ask your children to pitch in more with the house chores. Or you might want to talk to your boss about taking a few personal days to heal your body and mind.
If you have the resources, you can hire some help. For example, you can sign up for a food delivery service or pay somebody to regularly clean your home — even if it’s just once a month, it can make a difference.
Asking for help lessens the amount on your plate and frees up your time so you can do what’s truly important…
Enjoy life, honor your needs, and fulfill your goals!
Are You Able to Ask for What You Need?
You may tend to hold your needs close to your chest and hide them from the world.
But, if you hide your needs and don’t communicate them, other people won’t know how to support you.
It’s possible that you do this because you feel a sense of shame. You don’t want to ask for help because you think this will appear as weakness. Perhaps you’re afraid it’s an admission that you’re incompetent.
If these thoughts cross your mind when you think about seeking support, you may be dealing with limiting beliefs.
This may surprise you.
Asking for help requires self-awareness and self-confidence that may feel uncomfortable.
Special note: I’m so excited about my brand new 6-week online group coaching program for women to go From Struggle To Ease! It begins on Monday November 9, so make sure to act now.
During this group program, you’ll have the opportunity to experience the powerful cutting edge tools that have allowed me to let go of struggle and live without stress and overwhelm!
As a result of taking this program you’ll experience a life-changing transformation. This means that you will…
- Enjoy increased peace of mind by quickly dissolving conflict, upset, and intense experiences.
- Access more energy and enthusiasm for your business than ever before.
- Achieve your goals more quickly and easily.
- Say YES to yourself and what matters most, rather than the stuff that over-extends you.
- Have greater ease and flow in your relationships, work, finances, health, and more.
Click here now for more details and to claim your spot for From Struggle To Ease: A 6-Week Online Coaching Program for Type-A Women Who Want Results Now.
Burnout, Overwhelm, Self-Care, Self-Love
If your body had an actual voice, what would it say?
Would it thank you for feeding it nutritious foods and giving it time to rejuvenate?
Or would its voice be faint from the exhaustion and tension it’s enduring?
Sometimes you get so caught up in the daily grind — fulfilling your priorities and chasing your goals — that you forget about your constant companions…
Your body and mind.
When you neglect them, you neglect your needs… I’m talking about needs related to your well-being — sleep, nutrition, self-care.
When you ignore what your body is asking of you, you’ll quickly burn out. The burning fire that motivates you fizzles out and you’re left with ashes.
Instead of reaching the point of (almost) no return, you can build a healthier relationship with your body. When you learn how to honor your needs and desires, you can recognize and fulfill what YOU require to claim a life of greater ease, balance and growth.
What Does It Mean to Honor Your Needs?
Honoring your needs is respecting your mind and your body. You prioritize your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being by:
- Understanding and respecting your limits
- Creating healthy boundaries to protect your time and energy
- Distinguishing your needs from the needs of others
- Grounding yourself in your values and priorities
- Learning how to manage your time, so you create enough space for self-care
When you fulfill the above priorities, you can achieve well-being.
But maybe you already know this…
If so, then what is stopping you from following through on your good intentions?
The One Thing That Stands Between You and Honoring Your Needs
It’s simple, really.
You make self-care negotiable.
Instead, you think you have superpowers and you can just push through the exhaustion.
You believe you can power beyond your limits indefinitely.
You overwork yourself because you believe the ends justify the means.
Yet, think about this.
What happens when you achieve your goals, yet…
- Anxiety wracks your mind
- You feel uncomfortable in your skin
- You suffer from exhaustion and tension
- You’re unable to recognize your self-worth
See, life isn’t about “hustling” every waking hour. Even an ambitious woman, like yourself, needs time to honor the needs of your body and mind.
If you struggle with honoring your needs, these three tips will help move self-care to the top of your priority list.
How to Honor Your Needs: 3 Practical Tips to Make Self-Care a TOP Priority
#1 Be Ruthlessly Honest With Yourself
Self-care is about preserving your well-being and protecting your needs and desires. That means dedicating time — one of your most valuable resources — to care for and love yourself.
However, your time is finite.
Contrary to what mainstream media says, you can’t do it all.
Think about it.
You have 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
In order to give 100% at work, at home, in your relationships, and to yourself, it’s essential to be conscious of how you’re investing your valuable time and energy.
So, be honest with yourself when you consider taking on additional obligations, especially when you’re feeling overwhelmed.
Realizing that you can’t do everything isn’t necessarily “bad.” And it’s useful to be aware of how you spend your time and energy.
That’s why understanding your values and priorities is essential. While you may not get to everything, you can at least fulfill what’s most important to you.
This naturally leads you to create stronger boundaries. You start distinguishing between meeting the needs and desires of others and fulfilling your own.
And when you clearly understand the moments when you’re caring for yourself and not caring for yourself, you can make decisions about what you allow to enter into your life.
#2 Say “No” to Others, Say “Yes” to Yourself
Saying “no” might not sound like self-care but it is. Because saying no is a gift to preserving your well-being and manifesting your priorities.
Each time you take on a new project, a new task, a new favor that’s outside your priorities, you’re taking time away from yourself.
And this may lead you to feeling resentful, annoyed and frustrated not only with other people, but with yourself.
Because you know better.
You know that you won’t have the time for healing and developing yourself when you’re giving it away freely to other people.
And that is why being ruthlessly honest with yourself is the first tip — your resources are limited and you want to conserve them for healing and self-growth.
Otherwise, you will say yes whenever somebody asks something of you.
“When we say yes to everything and do not set boundaries with people, we can feel stressed, overwhelmed, and burned out,” said Jennifer Rollin MSW, LCSW-C in Psychology Today.
Instead, flip the dynamic.
Instead, start saying “no” to others, so you can start saying “yes” to yourself. Each time you say yes to yourself — even if it’s declining someone else — it’s a vote for honoring your relationships, intimacy, honesty and the truth.
So, which things should you say “no” to?
Look at what’s most important to you.
If your current needs align with giving your body the rest it needs, then you might need to say “no” to drinks and dinner with friends and co-workers after a long day at the office.
If you want to start feeling more energy and vitality, it might mean improving your diet and getting at least eight hours of sleep each night.
Your values and priorities offer a guideline on how to invest your time.
#3 Make Self-Care Intentional
Your time is finite and if you don’t spend it mindfully, you’ll throw it away on activities that don’t align with your purpose.
(That often looks like hours of phone scrolling or staying up late binge-watching your favorite series!)
After creating stronger boundaries, be intentional about when you schedule your priorities into your life. Calendar blocking helps you maximize the precious time you have, so that you’re setting aside time to honor your needs.
Start with making a list of everything you do and the times you want to do it. Your calendar blocks might look like:
- 7:00 – 8:00: Morning routine
- 9:00 – 10:30: Work
- 10:30 – 10:15: Stretches during break
- 10:15 – 12:30: Work
- 12:30 – 1:00: Lunch and ten minute walk
- 1:00 – 3:30: Work
- 3:30 – 3:45: Stretches during break
- 3:45 – 5:30: Work
- 5:30 – 6:00: Commute home
- 6:00 – 6:30: Relax (you deserve it!)
- 6:30 – 7:30: Make dinner
- 7:30 – 9:00: Dinner and spend time with family
- 9:00 – 10:00: Self-care
This is only one example. You might need to make changes to accommodate when you wake up, work, and go to bed.
Calendar blocks are another way of creating healthy boundaries so that you’re creating space and time to honor your needs and priorities. Blocking even one hour for nightly relaxation and “me-time” can soothe your mind and body.
Dissolve Your Limiting Beliefs
Making self-care negotiable… Putting your needs secondary to others… Not valuing yourself…
These are all limiting beliefs that are obstructing your pathway to growth. And they didn’t show up overnight either. They slowly formed over years of…
- Telling yourself that other people’s needs come before yours
- Pushing self-care to tomorrow multiple times
- Not giving your strengths and self-worth recognition
What these things have in common is that your needs don’t matter. With a belief like this, you diminish your potential for growth and restrict your access to the lifestyle you desire.
Burnout, Overwhelm, Self-Care, Self-Love
Do most days feel like a struggle just to make it to the end?
You’re overworked and overwhelmed. Even laying your tired head against your soft pillow does little to diminish the buzzing in your head.
Deep down, you know the remedy has nothing to do with the softness of your pillow. The more likely culprit is that you’re neglecting your well-being.
You’re not making YOU a priority.
You already know that taking care of yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually is critical. Each is a pillar to well-being — when one falls, the others are soon to follow.
So why do you continuously swing back and forth between periods of overwork and overwhelm to “catching up” on sleep and relaxation? Play this game for long enough and you’ll seriously burn out.
Follow the tips in this article and you could finally break that cycle and make self-care a daily priority.
Truly Understanding the Consequences of Self-Neglect
Are you experiencing any of these symptoms of self-neglect?
- You’re on autopilot: Your day feels like a blur. You’re going through the motions, each action absent of creativity, purpose, or joy.
- Other people’s needs come before yours: You continuously serve others before serving yourself. Now you’re noticing that your well is drying up and you have nothing left to give.
- Every day feels like playing catch-up: It feels like you’re always behind in attending to your responsibilities, and you just can’t catch up. This frantic pace keeps you feeling stressed and overwhelmed.
- Your mind swings between haze and chaos: Some days, you feel like you’re trapped in a thick brain fog. Other days, you feel like your mind is racing at a thousand miles an hour.
- You’re physically burned out: Long-term stress and overwhelm lead to body aches, muscle tension, and low energy. Your mental and emotional overwhelm have become physical manifestations.So often, we get stuck in autopilot, scrambling to get things done, and we don’t notice muscle tension or mental exhaustion until it’s too late.
So often, we get stuck in autopilot, scrambling to get things done, and we don’t notice muscle tension or mental exhaustion until it’s too late.
Recall the times within the past few months when you’ve experienced these symptoms. Remember the heaviness in your lids as you pushed yourself to work another hour. Experience the haze in your mind as you reread the same sentence over and over. Feel the intense desire to stay in bed, so you could hide from the day’s responsibilities.
I ask you to relive these scenarios because this is what happens when you neglect your body. These are the risks you assume when you “postpone” self-care.
Maintaining your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health is not a chore to push aside. It’s not a thing on your to-do list that you’ll get to “when you have time.”
Your body is a living organism worth honoring — not another item on your checklist.
Yet, why do you continue in these self-sabotaging cycles?
Why Do We Continue to Neglect Our Well-Being (Even When We Know Better)?
Much of it has to do with guilt or shame around valuing yourself.
Often, people mistakenly believe that self-care and self-compassion are selfish. After all, shouldn’t you focus your energy on helping others rather than yourself?
If you’ve been putting self-care on the back burner, you might be feeding this negative stigma. However, this mindset is working against you.
“When we fill our time with responsibilities and constantly prioritize the needs of others over our own, we can drain ourselves of energy and desire,” says Lisa Firestone, Ph.D. in Psychology Today.
Caring for yourself is one of the most incredible things you can do for yourself and others. When you empower yourself, you’ll have greater strength, energy, and desire to share your gifts with the people around you.
Each time you find yourself feeling guilty, tell yourself, When I care for and love myself, I am better able to care for and love others.
But self-care isn’t going to magically weave itself into your daily life. These tips will help you take conscious actions that make your well-being a priority every single day.
3 Tips That Encourage You To Make YOU a Priority
#1 Check in With Your Body More Often
A common reason why you might be pushing yourself too hard is that you don’t listen to what your body is saying until it’s too late. This often happens when your brain runs on autopilot — each day blurs into the next, as you focus on checking things off your to-do list.
A mental body scan helps you tune into your body. Follow these steps to help you experience what your body is telling you:
- Lay down.
- Take several deep breaths into your belly, breathing in through your nose and exhaling slowly from your mouth.
- Bring awareness to your toes. Observe any sensations such as tingling, pain, or tightness.
- As you become conscious of these sensations, breathe into them and notice what occurs. You may feel the sensation subside or even receive a message from this area.
- Repeat this process throughout your body, moving from your toes to the crown of your head.
Try doing this once each day – find a time that works best for you.
The more you listen to your body, the better you will understand what it’s asking of you. For example, a tense neck and shoulders might tell you to stretch more if you’re sitting at a desk all day. Or you might get the message to drink more water.
#2 Make Weekly Appointments with YOURSELF
Lack of time is one reason why so many women fail to take care of their bodies. That’s why I recommend putting it as a non-negotiable event on your calendar.
You make appointments with your doctor, attend meetings for work, and show up for family-related events.
You’re always showing up for others. What about showing up for yourself?
Prioritizing yourself is about putting YOU on your calendar and showing up on time, ready to care and love yourself.
Therefore, set a dedicated time for self-care. I’m serious! Go to your calendar and write in “self-care”. It may be your entire Saturday, or it may be for an hour every day after work. Try experimenting and choose what works for you.
But most importantly, stick to your self-care appointments. Some days, it may be tempting to cancel on yourself and squeeze in another hour of work. However, self-care will only make a noticeable difference when you declare it as a non-negotiable practice in your life.
#3 Seek Support When You Need It
Earlier, we talked about feeling guilt or shame around valuing yourself. You may feel similar emotions when asking for help.
Instead of relying on the help of others, you attempt to shoulder everything yourself.
But receiving help isn’t a sign of weakness. In fact, asking for help can be one of the kindest things you choose for yourself because it helps you show up even more for those you love. If you’re still struggling to make yourself a priority (even though you’re aware it’s what you truly need to do), getting more support may be exactly what’s required for you to experience more balance and fulfillment.
So, if you’re practicing self-care regularly and not experiencing the peace and renewal you desire… Or if you need more guidance to bring additional structure and balance into your life…
Ask for the assistance you need and allow yourself to receive it.
If you’re ready to overcome self-neglect and embrace self-care as a lifestyle, and require additional support, claim a Complimentary “Prioritize Yourself Breakthrough” Discovery session with me.
In this 60-minute consultation, you’ll:
- Reveal a clear and compelling vision of what else is possible for your life when you’re no longer neglecting yourself
- Get simple and practical tips for how to prioritize yourself with ease (starting immediately)
- Tap into self-care for greater energy, ease, and joy
- Explore how having a partner on your journey will provide a shortcut to all that you desire.
Click here now to claim your Complimentary “Prioritize Yourself Breakthrough” Discovery session.
Special note: I’m so excited to unveil a preview of Accelerated Evolution, my most effective coaching tool! Accelerated Evolution has changed my life and can change yours too. That’s why, at the end of the month, I’ll give you an opportunity to have an experience of these tools firsthand. So stay tuned…
And in the meantime, if you’re ready to find out how these tools can help you now, click here to schedule a “Breakthrough Struggle to Claim Ease” Discovery session with me.
Burnout, Overwhelm, Self-Care, Self-Love
2020 is a dramatic shift from the daily life you knew just one year ago. Sometimes, it’s hard to believe all the challenges we’ve had to overcome in only a few months…
Experiencing a pandemic. Sheltering-in-place. Wearing masks. Navigating heightened awareness of racial tensions.
In response to the adversities we’ve faced this year, we’re undergoing what clinical psychologist William Richard Miller calls quantum change. Quantum change is “a vivid, surprising, benevolent, and enduring personal transformation.” In response to recent events, this change is evolving our consciousness and revealing new possibilities for ourselves and for society.
Within those possibilities is a more empowered you.
Yes, you’ve been hard at work as a mother, a career woman, and a partner. You push yourself to limits trying to grow your career and provide for your family. Yet, you burn out in the process.
What about you and providing for your well-being?
Quantum change is creating a mindset shift:
- You can still pursue self-development without burning yourself out.
- You can share love and compassion with the people around you and express it to yourself.
- You can still fulfill upon your list of priorities while putting YOU at the top of that list.
Let’s explore how quantum change is empowering you to uplevel and care for yourself and the effect it has on the world.
Why Self-Development is the Path Forward
It might not be the answer you were expecting. You might even think it selfish — with all that’s happening in the world, why focus on YOURSELF?
Yet hear me out.
Self-development is the catalyst for positive change in the world. In his book Miracle Morning, Hal Elrod wrote, “Our outer world will always be a reflection of our inner world. Our level of success is always going to parallel our level of personal development.”
What does he mean?
It means that the impact you have on the world will reflect the efforts you put into growing yourself. After you nurture and manifest your gifts, you can share them with others. Gifts like deep compassion and an abundance mindset can be shared with your loved ones, your community, and even your country.
But what happens when you fail to make YOU a priority?
The Dangers of Neglecting Yourself
You already know.
- You suffer signs of burnout.
- Life feels overwhelming.
- You feel isolated and disempowered.
- Every day is a struggle just to get things done.
- Your potential goes unrealized.
Have you ever heard of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs?
In his Hierarchy of Needs, Maslow discusses what it takes to reach self-actualization — the peak of human experience. The foundations of that pyramid are securing your basic physiological needs (food and water), feeling safe in your environment, and cultivating reliable support systems.
Yet, in these uncertain times, you might feel vulnerable at all levels.
If you’re a woman of color, you might fear for your safety due to recent racially-charged tragedies. If you were laid off due to business shutdowns, you might worry about providing for your family. And the time you spent in quarantine might have led you to experience loneliness and isolation.
Times are challenging, I know. But all is not lost.
Cultivating a sanctuary of self-love and self-acceptance within yourself teaches you to embrace yourself as you are. And if you need any help to feel confidence and love in your own skin, support is available if you ask.
Create Quantum Change By Prioritizing YOU
Recent events have confirmed my worldview — the power to change your environment begins with creating positive change within yourself. Before I could properly support and empower other women, I had to start with supporting and empowering MYSELF.
This is why I became a Certified Accelerated Evolution coach — to inspire women to break through their mental and emotional blocks with greater ease and to more fully own their power, the same way I used these tools to help myself.
Do you feel guilty about taking time for yourself? Do you judge yourself because you know you can somehow summon the resources to work another hour, do another task, or pursue another project?
I certainly did.
This emotional and mental block can be difficult to identify and dissolve, because striving — even if it means burning out in the process — seems like a virtue.
Yes, self-development can mean putting in the work, yet it also means taking time to rest. Because your potential to manifest your gifts and share them with the world also relies on the care and attention you put into your well-being.
The positive change you desire in your outer world springs from the well of abundance and compassion you cultivate within yourself.
So, start there.
Start with caring and loving YOU.
Are you ready to lessen your struggle and choose ease in all areas of your life?
Quantum change is creating a mindset shift that reminds us: self-care isn’t negotiable.
Self-development is the path forward, yet it doesn’t have to mean achieving your goals at the risk of your health. You can manifest the change you desire by prioritizing self-love, self-care, and balance.
When you’re truly ready to make this shift in your life, sign up for a Complimentary 60-minute “Breakthrough Struggle to Claim Ease” Discovery Session with me.
In this 60-minute consultation, you’ll:
- Reveal a clear and compelling vision of what else is possible for your life when you’re no longer struggling and are enjoying your life again
- Get simple and practical tips for how to break free from your symptoms of overwhelm
- Tap into greater ease, energy and inspiration
- Explore how having a partner on your journey will provide a shortcut to all that you desire.
As I mentioned previously, Accelerated Evolution changed my life and it can change yours too. In October, I will let you know of an opportunity where you can experience these tools firsthand. So stay tuned…
And in the meantime, if you’re ready to find out how these tools can help you now, click here to schedule your complimentary “Breakthrough Struggle to Claim Ease” Discovery Session with me.
Burnout, Overwhelm, Self-Care, Self-Love
Are you wondering if there’s more to life than feeling overwhelmed?
Do you desire more space because your schedule is packed?
Is stress affecting your health and relationships?
If you answered yes to any of these, you’re not alone. Sometimes, it feels like you’re stuck in a cycle of overworking yourself, coping with the signs of burnout, and praying for relief. When you’re trapped in the cycle for long enough, your motivation wanes, your relationships become strained, and your performance suffers.
You want to create positive change, but chances are, you won’t break the cycle overnight.
Still, you can create mini changes one day at a time.
One small habit at a time.
Last month, we talked about letting go of the things that weigh you down:
This week is different. Instead of sharing what to let go, I’m sharing mini personal habits that you can embrace. When you practice these habits for long enough, you do more than exit the burnout cycle — you claim a life of greater ease.
The Power of Habits
When you form personal mini habits, you’re not just adding something else to your to-do list. You’re becoming a more resilient version of who you are.
For example, waking up 30 minutes earlier to do something that benefits you on a physical, mental, or spiritual level is more than just getting out of bed early. When you create this habit, you’re becoming someone who cares deeply about herself.
James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, shares the relationship between habits and identity. “Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become,” Clear wrote. “No single instance will transform your beliefs, but as the votes build up, so does the evidence of your new identity.”
In other words, one day will hardly make a difference. But weeks of faithfully practicing your habits can manifest the incredible and beautiful changes you desire. While each woman’s goals may vary, the following six habits will lead you to greater joy and ease.
6 Personal Habits to Practice Daily for More Joy and Ease In Your Life
#1 Have A Morning Practice
Before calls, texts, emails, and children beg for your attention, the morning offers a moment for silence and reflection. While the world sleeps, use this time to tune into your body. Before fulfilling what other people ask of you, first listen to what your mind and body ask of you. Their request might be physical, like more water and sleep. Or it might be emotional, like a deep and heartfelt conversation with a close friend.
A morning practice looks different for everyone, yet it need not be complicated. The following activities can help you tap into your inner dialogue:
- Meditation
- Yoga
- Journaling
- Prayer
- Reading
- Walking outside
Each of the above activities will strengthen your mind and body over time. Each morning you choose to fulfill upon your practice, you’ll feel a little more grounded and balanced. This resilience enables you to maintain a positive mindset throughout the day, which provides the opportunity to move closer to achieving your goals with joy and ease.
#2 Set An Alarm For Bedtime
Alarms aren’t just for waking up. You can also set an alarm for when it’s time to get ready for bed.
When following a morning practice, don’t make the mistake of sacrificing quality sleep. When your sleep suffers, you feel tired, irritable, and unmotivated. Getting adequate sleep — 7 to 8 hours — will keep you energized and motivated as you pursue your goals.
Making your sleep a priority is one way to love and honor your body. Just as your morning alarm tells you when to get up, your evening alarm reminds you that you can rejuvenate your body by preparing for a restful night’s sleep.
#3 Name 5 Things You’re Grateful For
Manifesting more joy in your life begins with acknowledging the blessings that already exist.
The bare minimum you need to survive is food, water, and shelter. Anything beyond this is a gift. Whether it’s nutrition, shelter, a healthy family or good friends, these things are all worth acknowledgment and appreciation.
Each day, pause for a few seconds.
Think of 5 things that you’re grateful for at this very moment. Then express your appreciation by saying aloud, “I am grateful for ______.”
I’ll share 5 things I’m grateful for right now: “I am grateful for my loving family, my cuddly cat, my comfortable home, my caring friends, and my fabulous mentors and coaches.”
Even during times of overwhelm, there is still much to appreciate. This daily gratitude practice will remind you to be joyful in the present while being open to receive the abundance yet to come.
#4 Reach Out And Connect
Powerful support systems contribute to a life full of love, warmth, and joy.
But we sometimes take the people we cherish for granted.
The truth is that our loved one won’t always be there. Our time on this physical plane is finite.
These recent months of self-isolation may have distanced you from those special people. It’s time to rebuild those bridges.
Take advantage of every moment you can to reach out and connect.
Time may feel insufficient, but love and joy can be infinite. Manifest both of these in your life through the relationships you keep. A simple text message or a phone call is all you need to keep those support systems strong.
#5 Eat A Home-cooked Meal
Your body is something else you might be taking for granted.
The time spent sheltered at home may have had you ordering take-out or delivery more often than is healthy. To show your body more appreciation, start feeding it delicious and nutritious foods.
Head to the grocery store and pull out your kitchen apron. Or, if you’re like me and want someone else to do the legwork, sign up for one of the meal delivery services that provide all the ingredients. Then, all you have to do is put the meal together. Eating a healthy home-cooked meal (don’t skip the vegetables!) will build the daily habit of respecting your body.
Your body will reward you with more energy, a sharper mind, and brighter skin over time. And as you enjoy this increased vitality and desire, you will manifest your vision with greater ease.
#6 Step Outside
While many non-essential businesses are reopening, many gyms remain closed.
Fortunately, you don’t need a gym to get your steps in.
You can step outside, feel the warm sunshine, and breathe in the fresh air — all without the price of a monthly gym membership.
According to Lifehacker, stepping outside can also promote mindfulness and reduce stress. “When things get overwhelming, as they so often do nowadays,” they wrote, “putting on a pair of comfortable shoes and going for a short walk—while maintaining proper physical distancing of course—can help bring a little calm to a chaotic world.”
This can be especially true if you’re working from home. Leaving your home to embrace the outdoors can bring much-needed separation from stress triggered by your work-from-home environment.
Don’t Let Overwhelm Block You From Your Best Life
2020 hardly feels like living your best life. Coping with COVID-19 and social injustice introduced new challenges and stressors that may reinforce the burnout cycle.
Yet you don’t have to postpone inner peace to 2021 and beyond. These daily habits teach you that even small actions, when done daily, can introduce powerful and long-lasting change — change that will create more joy and ease in your life.
Your journey doesn’t have to be a solitary one either. If you need additional support, claim a Complimentary “Overcoming Overwhelm” Discovery session with me.
In this 60-minute consultation, you’ll:
- Reveal a clear and compelling vision of what else is possible for your life when you no longer have so much on your plate and are enjoying your life again
- Get simple and practical tips for how to break free from your symptoms of overwhelm
- Tap into greater energy and inspiration
- Explore how having a partner on your journey will provide a shortcut to all that you desire.
Click here now to schedule a Complimentary “Overcoming Overwhelm” Discovery session.
Burnout, Overwhelm, Self-Care, Self-Love
It’s 2:00 and you’ve hit another afternoon slump. You wonder if you can make it to the end of the day.
“Why do I feel so tired all the time?” you ask yourself.
Even if you’re working from home due to coronavirus, it feels like another exhausting day in the office.
You consider pouring yourself another cup of coffee. You might even have an energy drink waiting for you in the fridge.
Yet there lies the problem. You rely on sources that offer temporary energy boosts. However, the problem — and solution — is deeper than that.
You’re having a new and different experience — life in quarantine. And with the added stress and anxiety, you may be experiencing coronavirus quarantine fatigue. “It’s just overwhelming,” says behavioral health therapist Dr. Jane Pernotto Ehrman, “and part of the fatigue is the uncertainty, unpredictability and the unknowns in all of this.”
That’s why it’s time to put away the caffeine and sugary energy drinks and practice a healthier response to feeling tired all the time: self care!
Self-care is free, easy, and can be done at home!
How Self-Care Can Optimize Your Energy
Energy is like a battery. Ideally, you’re waking up at 100%.
But what happens when you don’t get enough sleep? Or your diet is lacking nutrients? Or your life is all work, no play?
You might wake up at only 80% or 50%. These are only a few causes of low energy in women that can lead you to suffer from signs of burnout.
And if you’re experiencing exhaustion from coronavirus, you might be feeling any number of the following symptoms:
- Irritability
- Anxiety
- Low motivation
- Appetite changes
- Insomnia
- Racing thoughts
That’s why I created this two-part series on optimizing your energy, especially in these uncertain times. In this article, I explain how self-care can boost your energy. Next week, I’ll show you how to budget that energy with productivity tips.
So, why self-care? you might ask.
Everyday presents its own stressful challenges and the coronavirus outbreak has introduced new ones.
Yet, imagine starting every day at 100%. Your mind feels sharper. You have more bounce in your step. Your goals are clear. You know what you need to do. And you take action.
“If we don’t take action and recharge,” says Dr. Ehrman, “We will remain stuck. So, it’s important to relieve stress to re-energize and be more present.” Self-care helps you optimize your energy so that you can create and live your best life.
Here’s how you can do it.
Feeling Tired All the Time Because of Coronavirus Quarantine Fatigue? Here are 4 Self-Care Tips to Optimize Your Energy
#1 Clean Up Your Diet
Your body is like a car and the food you feed it is the gas you pump.
Without gas, you’re running on fumes. With poor-quality gas, your car starts experiencing some problems.
It’s the same way with food. Some foods are low-quality and do little for your body. They’re usually high in calories and low in nutritional value — think chips, candy, and fast food.
If you want to boost your energy, look at the food you eat. If you discover your diet could be better, try planning your meals in advance. This encourages you to be mindful of what your body is taking in. The following tips will keep your diet healthy and your body energized:
- Consume more complex carbs (like fiber-rich vegetables and whole-wheat grains)
- Avoid simple carbs (like cookies and dairy products)
- Increase your intake of dark, leafy vegetables (like spinach, broccoli, Swiss chard and kale)
- Reduce your caffeine intake to avoid energy crashes (like coffee, energy drinks and soda)
- Drink enough water (the Institute of Medicine recommends 9 cups each day for women)
But if you’ve been to your big chain grocery stores lately, you probably noticed that some shelves are picked clean. You may need to explore other options for buying nutritious foods.
Now is a good time to support your local businesses by visiting a nearby mom and pop store. Or you might even want to start a garden and grow your own produce!
When you feed your body high-nutrition foods, it rewards you with increased energy and longevity.
#2 Cultivate Better Work/Life Balance
As a modern woman, you wear several hats: mother, businesswoman, caregiver, spouse, and more. But one that you might forget to wear is the woman who practices self-care.
You spend all of your energy on other people and obligations, but forget to save some for yourself. You suffer from poor work/life balance. Your other obligations — whether professional or personal — dominate your life and your health begins to suffer.
Show yourself how much you love yourself by putting your own self-care first.
Try creating and maintaining a morning routine. Before you give your time and energy away, give it to yourself first. Exercise and meditation are great ways to kickstart your day. I enjoy greeting the morning with meditation and words of affirmation, followed by quality time with my pen and journal.
If you work from home — which many of us are doing in these crazy times — set a cut-off time for the end of your workday. Clean up your workspace and shut down for the day. Unless you’re a doctor or firefighter on call, work can wait until the next morning.
Your home should feel like a sanctuary. Don’t let coronavirus ruin it!
#3 Schedule a Well-Deserved Staycation
Daily self-care is critical to your health and well-being, but sometimes you need more.
Even when you’re maintaining a morning routine and getting enough quality sleep, you can still feel over-extended. If you’re still stressed, it may be time to take an extended break.
With what’s going in the world, now may not be ideal for traveling. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t relax and play!
Instead, schedule a staycation as soon as possible. Stepping away from your responsibilities, while staying home can do wonders for your health. A staycation gives your mind and body the time and space needed to declutter and unwind.
After a relaxing break, you can return to your daily responsibilities with renewed energy and focus.
#4 Cage Your Monkey Mind
Have you ever heard about monkey mind?
“Monkey mind is a term that refers to being unsettled, restless, or confused,” says Dr. Diana Raab, “It is also the part of your brain that becomes easily distracted.”
Has this ever happened to you?
You might be working on a task, but your mind veers instead to the latest COVID-19 update. There are many changes happening within your community. You might be checking your local news or social media to stay informed.
Each time you get distracted, you squander valuable time and energy.
Cage your monkey mind with meditation. Monkey mind often feels like you’re swimming in cluttered thoughts. Meditation pulls you out of the water by inviting your attention to the act of breathing. Many people remark on how clear and alert they feel after a meditation session.
If you’re new to meditation, try using guided meditation apps, like Insight Timer or HeadSpace. Their sessions will teach you the foundations of meditation and intentional breathing.
Do you have any energy-boosting self-care tips that I didn’t mention? Share them with me in the comments below.
Make Self-Care a Habit
“The holy grail of habit change,” says James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, “is not a single 1 percent improvement, but a thousand of them.”
Waking up with a fully charged battery will support you when you feel coronavirus quarantine fatigue creeping in. But this happens only when you commit to making self-care a daily habit.
You might not notice a difference in your energy levels at first. But if you maintain a self-care routine, you will notice higher energy levels over time.
And daily self-care doesn’t have to be a two-hour routine. It can be as simple as 10 minutes every day with my “From Burnout To Balance: A Simple 10-Minute Daily Self-Care Practice.”
This practice has been shown to:
- Increase mindfulness, well-being, self-confidence, and personal power
- Increase your ability to concentrate
- Cultivate a greater resilience to stress, a positive mindset, and a sense of hopefulness and calm
- Decrease stress and stress-related symptoms like frustration, mood swings, feelings of overwhelm or lack of control, anxiety, depression, low energy, headaches, body aches and pains, muscle tension, chest pain and rapid heartbeat, insomnia, and frequent colds and infections
- Reduce or even stop worrying
Click here now to claim your free gift of my “From Burnout To Balance: A Simple 10-Minute Daily Self-Care Practice.”
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