Self-Fulfillment, Self-Love
“Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.” ~ Plautus
Urgency might have been the force that led you to success in the past. The urgency of creating actions aimed to win might have been an advantage that helped you stand out in the world of business.
A sense of urgency may have accelerated your earlier career, yet is it still serving you?
You may not have realized that with urgency comes impatience.
And impatience calls forth stress and frustration, which can lead to feelings of overwhelm, restlessness, and lack of motivation. Eventually, you may experience physical symptoms, such as high blood pressure, stomach upset, fatigue, and burnout. Overall, impatience can be detrimental to your well-being.
On the other hand, patience can have beneficial effects. Patience provides a sense of calm and ease in times of adversity. As you practice patience, your experience of stress, anxiety and overwhelm begins shifting to that of happiness, joy, and relief. This can have a positive impact on your mental, physical and spiritual well-being.
So, you can navigate your actions with a sense of urgency or a sense of calm — impatience or patience. The cultivation of patience, through the ensuing practices, will aid you on your journey to peace of mind…
Teach others
“If you want something done well, do it yourself” is a proverb that the Type-A woman can relate to. Yet, what if, when someone does a task incorrectly, you were to let go of frustration and take action to show them how it’s done? You would help someone develop a new skill and become more understanding by seeing things from their perspective. Not only could you gain patience by teaching others, you’d also free up your schedule by delegating with confidence that the job will be done properly.
Listen
Don’t let your mind’s chatter eclipse the sounds of the present moment. At times you may feel a sense of urgency to take immediate action. The noise in your head is telling you to go, go, go, pushing you, so that you feel annoyed with the story your husband is telling or distracted from your child is sharing about their day. Listening to the dialog in your mind creates impatience, taking you away from being fully present and enjoying those you truly care about. Instead, tune in. Let the precious sounds of life fill your ears and your soul. You might even find your calm.
Be flexible
Let go of your high expectations and perfectionism. They can only lead to frustration and annoyance. When you adjust your expectations, imperfection no longer holds you back from enjoying life’s journey. As you become more flexible and accepting, you may find outcomes that are even better than you expected.
Push the pause button
You might think you need a positive outcome right now! Yet a great way to practice patience is to push the pause button on your desires. Take a walk before dessert, wait a day or two before purchasing the item you want, or practice a mindful exercise before jumping into your day. You may find gratification or peace of mind in the delay itself.
Be grateful
There’s always something to be grateful for, especially at times when you feel frustrated and impatient. When you choose to be grateful, you invite calm and ease into your experience. Minor irritations and inconveniences caused by impatience no longer matter. Speak a positive mantra when you feel impatient, such as, “this moment will pass” or “all is well”, and see how quickly impatient thoughts disappear.
Healthy wellbeing begins with patience, which guides your journey to peace of mind. And peace of mind allows you to feel more joy and ease.
Self-Fulfillment, Self-Love
Do you feel pressure to get things done quickly?
When you push yourself harder to reach your goal, is your wellbeing negatively impacted?
Is this also sacrificing your highest vision of success?
As a high-achieving woman aiming to conquer extraordinary goals, time can often feel like your greatest obstacle. Even when there is no externally established deadline, you may feel a self-imposed sense of urgency for immediate results.
In my previous article ‘What Is Success Without Sacrifice? Plus, How You Can Have It’, I spoke about how true success comes without sacrifice, from goals that are aligned with your authentic Self and add greater purpose and meaning to your life.
Yet a goal that presents during your spiritual journey is most likely no small feat. These types of endeavors may take longer to come to fruition than we desire. A Type-A woman typically wants results fast, which can, at times, conflict with the pace of Divine right timing. If your spirit is calling you to pursue something, patience is key to receiving the results of this goal with greater ease.
Patience encourages you to be flexible, whether or not things go as planned. When obstacles arise, patience invites you to adjust your plans with ease. As you continue on your spiritual journey, you’ll notice that the methods used for developing patience are similar to the consistent practices used to embody a more spiritual mindset.
Here are some practices you can use to receive the benefits of patience and move closer to your goal:
Invite spaciousness
Gift yourself relief from unnecessary timelines and pressure that can build frustration. When you give yourself a break from efforting and pushing to move forward, things work out in Divine right timing to serve your highest good.
Welcome your journey to success
Without patience, you may make decisions or take actions that short-circuit the highest vision of your goal. Patience is a tool that encourages acceptance and faith that your goal will manifest even better than you could have imagined.
Bring enjoyment to the process
Each step can be more enjoyable when you can let go of your emphasis on its urgency and adopt a more playful and relaxed mindset that is not restricted by timelines. Obstacles that occur will feel more like interesting challenges rather than frustrating roadblocks.
Pause before acting
Fight or flight is ingrained in our DNA and it’s natural to want to respond quickly when obstacles occur. However, when danger isn’t present, we can allow ourselves time to react. If you’re feeling frustrated with the outcome and unsure about what to do next, take a pause before responding. This time allows you to think more clearly, process the situation, and glean the message that’s being shared. You may notice a shift in your feelings about the “obstacle” and even receive ideas for how to proceed toward your goal with greater ease.
Keep a journal
Keeping a journal can help you identify any inner reasons for why you’re facing external resistance to achieving your goal. By writing down your thoughts at the end of each day or week, you’ll be better able to identify the source of this resistance and more aware of the shifts that need to be made for you to reach your goal with patience and ease.
Learn meditative practices
If you’re feeling unnecessary pressure or frustration, it could be caused by a rigid timeline or an unyielding sense of urgency for the desired outcome. This can create constant worry or fretting. Meditation can clear those thoughts from your mind and allow you to cope in the present.
Learning how to use your breath mindfully is a meditative practice that can help resolve impatience. A simple breath can help you detach from your thoughts and focus on the moment. Plus, applying your breath to moving mindfully will assist you in reaching a more meditative state because your mind will be focusing on your body’s movement.
When you consistently work on these practices, you’ll notice greater ease and flow in reaching your goal with more patience.
Befriend Divine right timing. Let patience guide your journey to reach your goal with ease.
Self-Fulfillment, Self-Love
Did you know that…
Embracing spirituality brings you success with more ease?
Tapping into your unconscious mind accesses greater internal power?
It is you who creates YOUR reality?
Yes, that can be a lot to absorb! Especially for a high-achieving woman like you who, like me, has earned a “PhD” in being successful with a lot of effort. Since each woman has her own idea about what success looks like, your desire for success may lead you to pursue greater career goals, financial goals, professional or personal development goals, or something else. Yet, when you achieve your goals, is the success as fulfilling as you’d hoped?
Be honest with yourself…
I used to think that accomplishing my goals would bring me long lasting happiness. It took me years to become aware that I was on a goal-achievement rollercoaster and to acknowledge that the cost to me was increasing over time. I had sacrificed my youth, my first marriage, my health, children, friends, and more for the illusion of what I thought success would be.
Success doesn’t have to be about sacrifice. Life needn’t be about goal-setting and achievement. The key to a happy and fulfilled life is optimizing your spirit and mind. When you tend to your spiritual and emotional health, you uplevel your experience of life. Being spiritually mindful will allow you to embody success without sacrifice.
How the mind works
It’s important to understand how the mind works. It is made of two main parts, the unconscious and the conscious. Although your mind begins without limits, it adopts the limiting beliefs that are generated over time, both consciously and unconsciously.
The unconscious mind makes up around 95% percent of your brain. It manages and runs your body and stores all your memories. Your conscious mind, the part that does all your external interacting, is only around 5% of your brain.
The integration of your conscious and unconscious mind is key to discovering your true Self, learning how to love yourself fully and knowing your purpose in life. You are then able to tap into your unlimited potential and have all that you desire.
When your conscious mind and unconscious mind work cohesively, you have access to success, harmony, and balance. However, unresolved memories and emotions can create conflict between the conscious and unconscious minds, which can result in obstacles to your self-discovery and personal/professional growth.
It is crucial that your conscious mind is in sync with the unconscious mind. As I mentioned earlier, the unconscious mind controls the actions you don’t actively think about doing. It’s also where you store information you’re unaware of or not able to process at that moment. When we unlock the unconscious mind, it can connect with the conscious mind and they work together to help you access new levels of success. This is a different kind of success, one that is more spiritually aligned with your Self and thus it’s without sacrifice.
Tools that unlock the unconscious mind
Quiet
Those who practice meditation are more in tune with the unconscious mind. By tuning into your breath and shifting your awareness to the body you begin to slow down your thinking. Having fewer thoughts gives your conscious mind a break, helping you connect to the unconscious. If you have difficulty sitting still, you can do mindful meditation while physically active and focus on your movements with intention.
Writing
Your unconscious mind absorbs information and ideas that don’t pass through your conscious thoughts. When you hand write words on paper, you begin to engage with these unconscious thoughts. Writing is a powerful tool for accessing the unconscious. Starting a daily journal can help you connect.
Visualization
Picturing something, an idea or a feeling is another powerful way to engage with the unconscious. When you imagine something in your mind, you’re sending that information to the unconscious. Try creating a vision board of your goals and desires (be open to endless possibilities). Those images will be stored in your memory which is part unconscious.
Sleep
The unconscious mind never stops, even when you’re sleeping. Before going to bed, spend time thinking about what success looks like for you. This is a great time to write in your journal or answer a question that you had stuck in your head. While you sleep, these thoughts will load into your unconscious, ready for you to use the following day.
Spiritual Technology
These are techniques and practices (i.e. introspective questioning and energy shifting processes) used to tap into your unconscious and give you a higher level of awareness. Spiritual Technology helps deepen your inner connection and guide you to an authentic, empowered place.
An extremely powerful form of spiritual technology is Accelerated Evolution (AE), as it is based on a blend of ancient metaphysical concepts derived from martial arts, Shiatsu massage, hypnosis, neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), and Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).
Accelerated Evolution transforms unconscious energy patterns that get in the way of success. It helps with the release of conflict and struggle, limiting beliefs, and stuck energy such as unresolved issues. This allows for the flow of energy and freedom in all areas – relationship, work, money, family, fitness, and quality of life.
In addition to earning my doctoral degree in metaphysics, I chose to become a Certified Accelerated Evolution Practitioner because I found it to be the most direct, swift and effective metaphysical method to create lasting change. If you’re interested in learning more about how Accelerated Evolution can help you, email me at support@AskDrWhitney.com.
By connecting your unconscious with your conscious mind, you develop the spiritual awareness to embrace success with greater ease and flow. Success is no longer a never-ending sequence of goal-achievement and sacrifice. It transforms into a spiritual journey based on the desires of your true Self.
A spiritual mindset frees you from the cycle of constantly needing to be better and do more. It provides clarity for a greater life vision. One that opens you to new opportunities. A spiritual mind shows you how to reach new levels of success without sacrifice.
Keep a look out for future information and programs about Success Without Sacrifice.
Self-Fulfillment, Self-Love
What is your definition of success?
If you’re anything like me…
If you’re an accomplisher…
If you’re a high achiever…
Then you thrive on challenges and getting results. By the time I was 24, I was a successful financial advisor and, shortly after that, became my company’s youngest branch manager. My life was the adventure of constantly attaining higher goals and making more money than the men in my field.
Like a horse with blinders, I was completely focused on what was ahead, what I could get done, and the next milestone to conquer so I could receive the attention I craved. With each new achievement came another surge of adrenaline, my mind sent out signals of gratification, triggering dopamine sensors, and encouraging happiness.
Yet the recognition and the highs were short-lived, so I constantly needed another “success” fix. Because each new accomplishment rewarded me with the feeling of success and, therefore, happiness. However, the relationship between success and happiness is more complicated than merely an action gratified by a feeling.
Is your happiness driven by an ongoing series of one-time successes?
If the foundation of your happiness is ongoing achievement, it may be time to delve into what will bring you long-lasting happiness.
There are three basic types of happiness: pleasure, passion, and purpose. Pleasure gives you an instant reward such as a tasty meal or a great song. Although pleasure is important to your well-being, it doesn’t provide long-term joy. Passion comes from being part of something you love – creating art, participating in a group activity, or enjoying your favorite sport – and can bring more consistent joy. The third type of happiness is purpose. To have a purpose is to find greater meaning in your existence. This can evoke a deep sense of fulfillment and an innate feeling of joy.
When happiness is based on the rush of excitement from accomplishment, it provides pleasure yet not necessarily passion or purpose. When that moment of happiness is over, you must move on to the next accomplishment, then the next after that to continue to feel happiness. There are more effective and longer lasting ways to find happiness. When you expand beyond the inclination to check boxes, a deeper and more meaningful sense of happiness will emerge.
As you redefine what success means for you, incorporate all three types of happiness into your journey. Pleasure may be the only type of happiness gained from what you currently consider “success”. When you shift your definition of success to include passion and purpose, you will possess a roadmap to true happiness.
Evoke passion and purpose in your life by redefining your idea of success.
Step #1 – Categorize
Separate your life into categories. I consider the foundational Fs: faith, family, friendships, finance, fitness, fulfillment, and fun. Choose those that are most predominant in your life or use them all. You may even find that as you look at these categories, there’s some overlap.
Some examples:
Fitness
Eating habits, exercise, and care for your mind and body.
Finance/Career
How you earn and manage your money.
Family/Friendships
How you manage your relationships.
Faith/Fun
How you support and care for your spirit.
Step #2 – Create new goals
Create new goals for these categories that include passion and purpose.
This could look like:
Fitness/Health
Joining a sports team or group activity with friends or coworkers. Being part of a group will ignite passion towards your health goals.
Finance/Career
Pursuing additional education and expanding your expertise to get a raise, a promotion, or to become an entrepreneur doing something you truly love and with greater purpose.
Family/Friendships
Putting more energy into deepening your relationships allows you to experience greater passion and supports your emotional needs.
As you redefine your goals to include passion and purpose, your idea of success may change form. This shift in perspective can provide you with a roadmap to happiness. However, redefining success may not necessarily be a smooth ride. Whenever you make changes, it’s not unusual to experience challenges or setbacks.
As you define your new meaning for success you may notice…
Obstacles
Look at obstacles as opportunities to grow and build upon your passion for change.
Detours
Redefining what success means to you may lead down a road with twists and turns. It may mean a shifting in direction to explore different areas and try new ideas before one feels right.
Comparison or judgment
Just because someone else appears happy in their success doesn’t mean you’ll be happy with what they have. Stay focused on yourself without judgment and release the desire to compare your journey with others.
Success looks different to each individual. What matters most is that your definition of success brings you joy. As you uplevel your goals to include passion and purpose, your idea of success may change form and provide your roadmap to true happiness.
Self-Care, Self-Love
High-achievers are driven to say “yes.”
Yes, to show up.
Yes, to help a friend.
Yes, to take on more.
I used to believe that if I didn’t say yes, I was inadequate, letting someone down, or not capable of doing it all. I thought that the word “no” could negatively impact my success or how people perceived me.
Yet, over time, I learned it can do just the opposite. It helped me choose and achieve my most important priorities without impacting my personal wellbeing. Because when I say no, I’m saying yes to myself and greater self-love.
The practice of saying no is about setting healthy boundaries. Boundaries are parameters that help protect your energy. They are a way to communicate your desires and show others how you should be treated. They keep you from overextending yourself with commitments, which could otherwise lead to burnout or feelings of resentment.
Saying yes on autopilot can start to affect your well-being. Yet setting healthy boundaries doesn’t mean saying no mindlessly. Boundaries establish a healthy balance that respects others while caring for yourself.
Learning to set firm boundaries and say no is an act of self-love and love for others. Take a moment to reflect on the times when you may have felt anger or resentment towards yourself or others. Perhaps you became fatigued from taking on too much or felt taken advantage of by someone else.
If any of this resonates with you, it might be time to reevaluate your boundaries and embrace self-love.
Why say NO
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Enrich your relationships
Setting healthy boundaries creates transparency, which can be a strong foundation for trust in relationships. When you set limits on your time and energy, your loved ones will have a deeper understanding of your needs and desires. If someone refuses to respect the boundaries you set, it may be time to reevaluate that relationship.
Spreading yourself too thin won’t help you accomplish more. Saying no helps you stay focused on your primary vision. You’ll be more effective with your time and energy when you don’t try to manage it all.
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Experience greater joy and wellbeing
Saying no to others means saying yes to yourself. Saying yes to yourself means more time to enjoy the things you love without feelings of stress or fatigue. As much as you may want to please others, make yourself a priority by choosing your own wellbeing.
If you’re a YES person, setting up healthy boundaries may feel uncomfortable at first. You might feel guilt or stress when saying no to a friend or client. It might feel unnatural to go against your urge to please others. Yet, wouldn’t you rather honor your feelings and say no, than feel resentment because you said yes when you wanted to say no.
When to say NO
1. Your plate is already full
If you find yourself feeling stressed and too busy to fit in yet another request for your time, no could be your best option. Compromising your own wellbeing isn’t good for anyone involved.
2. You feel internal resistance
Having extra time to spare isn’t a good reason to say yes. When you feel resistant to a request for your time, trust your instincts.
3. There’s no time for those you love
As a high-achiever you may tend to get caught up in all that you’re doing. Yet setting aside time for yourself and those you love is an excellent reason to say no. Prioritize your time with loved ones and do what you truly desire.
Saying NO empowers you to take charge of your well-being and renew self-love. When you set and enforce healthy boundaries, you avoid feelings of resentment, stress, and overwhelm. If not being able to say NO has you feeling exhausted, depleted and on the brink of burnout, you are not alone.
Several years ago, I suffered from extreme exhaustion that led to burnout. I have since learned what it takes to be engaged, inspired and passionate about my life (again). This is why I created my upcoming 5-Day Challenge, From Exhausted To Exhilarated: The Top Five Secrets To Increase Your Energy Now.
This 5-day challenge is for you if…
- You live in an almost constant state of exhaustion, sleepwalking through life.
- You’re forgetful and have a hard time focusing.
- You have difficulty sleeping. (No wonder you’re so tired all the time!)
- You’re frustrated and irritable more than you’d like to admit.
- You no longer have the energy to do it all, so you’re playing catch up.
To reclaim your life, click here and register for my 5-Day Challenge: From Exhausted To Exhilarated: The Top Five Secrets To Increase Your Energy Now.
